Wellness Without Obsession – You ask me if you will let go of the diet mentality, the restriction, and live in peace one day. Suppose it is possible to live feeling well-being if you can love each other one day.
Because it gives you the feeling that you have never felt, which is not valid: We come into the world like this.
We are born with a healthy relationship with the world, with food, feeling peace, and balance.
But at some point in our life, or even since our arrival in it, this balance is broken due to the deficiencies, helplessness, violence (visible or invisible), impacts, and painful experiences that we live.
This love for ourselves is being covered and forgotten, and we use substitutes to fill the unbearable emptiness that remains, to relieve and forget the pain we feel.
But the good news is that it is still latent within us. It is part of us, and therefore it is recoverable.
We have the potential, the base, and the internal resources to achieve it.
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At the beginning of the road, we find it hard to believe that it is possible:
Some people who have just started the process see it as very far and difficult. It is natural to feel this when starting any change, especially in something so important, abstract, unknown, and complex.
They often ask me how they live it and what other people achieve because they find it hard to believe that this is possible. It is very personal; each story is unique and confidential.
Except when they give you their experience in the form of a testimonial, they encourage other people in their process, as is the case of Nuria.
She has been in an individual accompaniment process (online) for four months.
We are still working, but she has reached a point where she has been able to realize the changes that have taken place in her and her process:
He has transformed the obsession with losing weight into a lasting state of peace and well-being, although he still has aspects to work on.
And he wanted to share it in case it can help someone else on their path and realize that it is not necessary to reach “the goal” to enjoy success.
Reading something like this can help us a lot because we feel identified, and it drives us to see how other people have achieved it.
It is the potential to free yourself from the obsession to lose weight:
If possible. Just as it is to redefine the concept of success.
What does this mean? It means everything. Because this depends on whether or not we get out of the loop or continue to feed it, this will depend on how we will live the process and how much we will learn and grow with it.
And this is what is essential. It is the mission of our symptoms, of our impulses.
Redefining success is beginning to recognize and focus once and for all on everything we get out of the process, and it has nothing to do with weight or the shape of our body.
As Nuria has done. She now values other health markers; now, she recognizes the steps she takes and everything she learns, focusing on self-care and feeling peace.
Before, I focused on the calories I ate, on the kilos I lost. She was dictated by a scale before her state of mind, her way of spending the day, or what she could eat.
Does it resonate with you?
How it resonates with me too! And how I am filled with emotion every time a person reaches this point!
In addition, it gives meaning to my symptoms suffered, to what I experienced.
I lived it too and believed in recovery:
With time and personal work, I transformed pain, guilt, and shame into great learning.
Also, in an excellent opportunity to transform my life and my work. And above all: something to be deeply grateful for.
Thus, every time someone achieves it, the same emotion invades me and ratifies my conviction and certainty that it is possible to achieve it. And that the path I chose is the right one.
Because it is not the same to live it in your skin, which could be something exceptional, as to confirm it with the people I accompany daily.
A proof that it is possible:
Nuria is 49 years old and can say that she has been on a diet all her life; she first did it when she was seven years old. And she didn’t stop.
She has lived -or instead survived- as she says-between binge eating and restrictions, losing weight, and gaining weight. She had no idea what her natural weight was, nor her wild way of eating.
It came to me after I started reading my book. She felt that perhaps I could help her, and she requested a visit with me.
When we started the process, she did not trust herself, nor did she believe she could make it.
She also didn’t think her eating or weight had anything to do with anything other than her lack of willpower, but she was open to working and finding out what was behind what was happening to her.
Their testimony can also help us become aware that we do not need to reach the final goal that we had set for ourselves, feel changes, enjoy them, and recognize them.
At last: to enjoy the journey.
Also, we can realize that this is not a direct jump. As Machado said: Walkers, there is no path; the path is made by walking.
This is part of the result of these months of personal work:
This is part of the result of these months of deep personal work attending to your entire Being: body, mind, emotions, and spirit:
“Before, I focused solely on kilos. Although I was starving, I only ate a breast and left. When she weighed me, and I hadn’t lost anything, she told me why I suffered so much, and I went to the other extreme.
Now, I can focus on other more important and meaningful things to me. Things tell me that I am on the right track, although I still have a long way.
I will tell a few, but indeed, there are more
- It is easier for me to walk, and I no longer choke when climbing stairs. I am walking two or three days a week, without forcing myself, because I like it and it feels good.
- Moreover, I feel happier and more vital.
- I focus more on my sensations than on the shape of my body, and I feel better and better; although sometimes I don’t look good physically or how I would like, I can manage those thoughts.
- I eat foods that feel good and nourish me effortlessly.
- I make better decisions. Naturally, I do not choose from the mind, and it is from within.
- I respect eating if I’m hungry; I no longer deprive myself of the feeling of hunger. And if what I feel is not hunger, and it is appetite, I allow myself to feel and think if it suits me or not from freedom.